Genesis and Phthora

"Genesis is coming forward and arriving in unconcealment."

"Phthora means the departure and descent into concealment of what has arrived there from unconcealment."

"The coming forward into...and the departure to...become present within unconcealment between what is concealed and what is unconcealed. They initiate the arrival and departure of whatever has arrived."

Martin Heidegger - Early Greek Thinking, Anaximander Fragment, tr. David Farrell Krell
(pg.30)

One more for the road

No road, but having 50 posts even was irritating. So, generation and corruption are the same thing or neither exist but a medium between the two, or both these options or neither of the two. This site contains the truth about the truth, although the tired poem that follows is meant to be a deterrant so that readers will think this site is crap written by a pretentious faker who tricks the reader into believing his work is the truth about reality and the reality of existence whereas in fact it simply appears to be deep, novel and genius while it is actually persuasive confused nonsense. But should we value sense over nonsense, organized over confused? I don't think it really matters: i'll always take an amusing lie over the harsh truth. Lesson complete.

Tired and waiting
for a space to clear
in the distant horizon.
Listening to the
sleeping dogs snore.
Dry, peeling like a snake,
throat rejects liquids
and solids. Body wants
to starve, brain is
indifferent: in an
abstract world
replacing suffering
with patience.
Hands gone numb,
feet gone numb,
leg incessantly shaking.
Becoming impatient,
but there's no point
to suicide.
People at work, me
alone with nothing to do
not bored not wanting
creating bliss.

The beginning of the end - the end of the beginning

whatever comes out goes onto the page with no punctuation stream of consciousness writing thinking feeling breathing doing something what writing in need of punctuation to not seem silly and I begin again to never end the beginning - progress - or never begin the end - decline - and so we remain in a world of grey matter squashed between the apparent but illusory realities of good and bad, growth and decay, generation and corruption, neither side winning the fiercest battle in history; although if one is the other and the other is the one there is no longer room for the grey area pillow where we were previously content to rest our tiny but powerful heads. But now the grey area shifts to the space between whether the two opposites are one or whether the pillow between the opposites remains. Can we then say that these two can be one leaving a further grey area with its opposition? Will this continue forever in some way or another?

So I have come to the conclusion of this blog site by convincing myself that either generation and corruption do not exist for what exists is the grey area between the two, both growing and decaying at the same time, or that, due to this or even separately, both are one: in the same act, motion, thought, circumstance, happening both are occuring simultaneously with the movement of time. We neither progress nor decline for both are one or neither exist but the medium between the two.

Although the individual cannot get better unless having had more time means getting better and time does not necessarily mean improvement unless all experience is good experience in which case with an increase in the amount of experience we gain we become better adapted, mentally, or simply improved. But this all ends when we die and our children must go through the same again to no avail with no improvement to humanity.

And God fell to his knees and said to man: "You created me to help you. Now I am finally demolished. You are on your own to continue purposeless, moralless, hopeless, knowing only that the same dull round shall be repeated endlessly, and all this, for nothing."

A little bit of sense

Honesty, I do but why?
Honor, respect, trust:
if they'll never discover
and you keep it up
and remember who and what:
it can only help.

I feel - the first time I've written on the blog about how I feel - displaced, neglected, I must make people interested and keep them so, what a hassle! I can't give too much, overwhelming, only a little at a time. But I give so much so quickly and then run out of insight and they get bored and begin to get bored with everyone. Tonight I said again: "I'm tired of the truth". He won't even fully understand it, he understands what the game is, but has not come to understand himself: I guess we can never fully come to understand ourselves but we must at least attempt to and struggle with this to understand others, life, and being for we are all we can know of existence. Truculence must be restrained or else everyone will go insane from having come to realize too much: and even when I try to avoid knowing knowing we cannot know that we know anything but this, possibly that I am, I still presuppose that there is an underlying reality to existence! I feel gone. Full submission so as to not reveal the secrets that must not be revealed: as Kipling said "If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools".

The essence of Truth

Rafatiki ran up the mountain to: A. see the beautiful view B. feel the gratification of accomplishment C. lose weight D. feel the pleasure given by the stimulated endorphins E. get to school F. Something other than the above...

Where did he find the nourishment to provide the energy for this run?
Food no doubt, but from whence came this food?
As aid from the US or the UN. Still further,
from farmers paid by the government who plow
the fields in nebraska; from a seed, from
another previously existing plant, repeat
until "only God knows" or evolution
by some means of which we cannot be certain:

the point has now been obviously expressed: the whence of each thing carries back to an origin that cannot be explained with certainty: the regressive method of questioning is as futile as trying to say what a thing is: all essence is simply the appearance of a more fundamental essence.

Did I get sidetracked from trying to appear insane while concealing a meaning deeper than the ocean floor, I could even say the earths core? These two issues are intimately bound up with each other, the first being that the answer to the first question, which I didn't even put as an option, for if you have read all of my blogs you should know, is G. All of the above, for truth cannot only be one opinion or one side of the argument but must be the combination of all of them.

So I end this lesson on truth and essence with a fullstop.

Win, lose, or draw

Don't let anything by you,
embarass yourself,
or submit forever, means
to always be acute,
never distracted from focus;
to never lose - wit.

But to stick up for oneself,
ones opinions, is this wrong?
Do people prefer those who
put up a good fight and lose
to those who don't even fight
and just submit?
Or those who win?
I guess it depends on the person:
the domineering prefer the second,
the ones who enjoy a good argument,
the first, and the docile, the last.

Can you appear submissive by agreeing with whatever is said while all the while concealing your own viewpoint that would win the argument? But an urge is felt to overcome and reveal, although after this brief moment of pleasure regret takes over. Or would you forget your own opinion and begin to believe the other opinion? Wouldn't you end up appearing indifferent rather than docile while the other can so obviously tell that you are refusing to speak for a reason, or that you are trying to conceal what you believe? If you haven't read my other writings, is it better to win and lose your strong argument to another who can use it than to lose concealing the truth? Is it more moral to win or to lose? Losing can sometimes please the other and winning can sometimes please the other, it depends on the person, but choosing the wrong one can have devastating consequences: you decide. A draw tends to be the most upsetting: agree to disagree. This could go on forever, there's just something so interesting about argument!

Isn't this what poetry is all about?

lived experiences:
blah blah blah
and She rises to
leave (annoyed);
I wanted to
speak to her after
(heartbroken).

Better than rejection
at least, or is it
worth the shot?
{Depends (diaper)
on what you want,
what you expect:
if you expect rejection
you won't be upset,
if you don't want sex,
or at least appear so,
you won't be rejected:
the secret.}
Or, the possibility
alone of finding
chemistry: speak to
everyone!

Do we get along with more members of the opposite sex than we don't get along with?: perhaps we can never know because we only associate with those we get along with, but I would say that initial encounters, which are the most important, primarily based on looks and male questions, either repel or attract: it depends on your looks and your skill at the art, but nevertheless I would think it also depends on who you choose to meet, random girls at clubs or friends of friends, for the latter is more prone to try to get along while the former is more selective and prone to repel, which most of them do for the sheer enjoyment of the act. Outside the classroom depends on what you have said in the class, looks, aura-for more intelligent women look for a glow, and most are willing to conversate although the lack of wit and/or intelligence would immediately or in due course instigate rejection: if you're good they want you, that is, if you don't want them or appear to not want them: indifference is the key to attraction, persuasion, intimidation, although at the same time you must appear honest: the trick is in the Augenblick(glance of the eye): if you keep eye contact too often or for too long you appear desperate, helpless, honest and needy, but for too short you appear dishonest, sneaky, a trickster, deceptive: a balance must be found.
But the best way to persuade, seduce, intimidate, after indifference, which must be your style and aura at all times, although you must have gone through apathy and come out positive (as opposed to negative) and motivated, is to offer beneficience and affirmation: these concepts I believe are self explanatory and as such I will leave them as they are: want a drink? you look beautiful this evening...

Poem - Reality

As the music plays - in the background,
not really listening: what does really
really mean? Recreation
again, half-
thoughts, questions: no will to attempt
an answer. It would evade me,
asymptotically:
I would think it were flawless only to
annihilate it.
Ok, so, as opposed to appearance or
semblance: a Ding-an-sich, contingency,
the truth having followed a joke lie,
which is what it really is: what it is
opposed to.
There is no really, only belief
that there is an ultimate reality
to existence: and when we
think something is really the case
we are easily shown or proven otherwise:
the belief is a mirage in the abyss,
and we are thirsty only to throw
sand into our faces.
A joke lie
played on humanity by the non-God
of truth.
Really can question the
validity of another's statement,
demanding affirmation, which shouldn't
persuade
one into hence believing the said,
but does, although responding
sarcastically -
no not really - should do the trick.
To believe is to escape the Nihilism
that spurs on the pessimism that
ruins our lives:
one reason alone:
not to believe is still to believe,
in that there is no reality:
necessary illusions,
But we (really) cannot escape after
knowing this - we will always doubt
our belief or never fully believe
because we know that what seems to be
the truth, reality, could very well
be a lie, appearance.

Am I in control of myself?
Or does something possess me?
I'd like to claim
that life itself possesses us,
that we can only escape it in death.
Our desire to possess objects and others
stems from our desire to release ourself
from our being possessed by life.
But perhaps there is no me to be possessed.
Then who is this? Perhaps others.
Then they must be others and everyone
must be others: there must be A self,
at least, for anyone to be others.
Or everyone must be no one...

Imagination gone Broke
cos inspiration left
home, starving and
scantily clad; irony
stole everything we
had, and I need
inspiration's help
to do something about
irony - its a
vicious circle
and I'm trapped.
But when or if
I ever finish irony
I'd lose thought, right?